Hxdream

I would love to share this blog of my own recent experience and what it has opened up for me.

I recently took in a fully grown adult doberman thinking that it would be the right fit for me and my home. After coming home with the dog I found my body in a flight or fight response from a few growls that were made towards me and sadly even though my logical mind understood that this would take time my body was not on board with what was going on responding poorly as time went on.

During the dogs stay with me I did my best making sure the dog didn’t have to suffer from my own panic. I took him on long walks multiple times a day, trained him even through my fears, did all I could to ensure his own personal comfort over my own. Through it all my bodies fight or flight response would NOT turn off resulting in night sweats, hemorrhaging, deep cystic acne appearing on my face, nausea, and not to mention not being able to eat. My body was having a very intense response.

In my state of fear, I clung onto those around me to support me, talk me out of my panic and spiral response. I was like a scared child looking for someone to hold me.

After 3 short days I knew that I could no longer hold the dog in my care and needed to make arrangements for the dog to either be taken to its original owners or find a new home. Sadly, the previous owners didn’t want their dog of 8 years to be brought back and had me coordinate with the dogs trainer to find him a new home. With this being the case I had to keep the dog under my care with no clear knowing of how long. This panicked me as I was already having such a poor physical response.

I clung on to friends like a frightened cat desperate not to let go. I became angry towards the previous owners venting out my frustrations for not being able to take the dog back home but what I greatly failed to recognize was my own inability to take responsibility of the position that I had gotten myself in.

I don’t know why that stood out to me after reflecting on the situation but that was a huge eye opener of something that I wasn’t doing in my own life. Taking accountability for my choices regardless of who was involved or how it turned out.

Every choice we make is a decision we enacted on. Although the outcome is out of our control there needs to be a level of accountability and ownership if we hope to navigate as a victor and not a victim to life. Life from this perspective allows for great oversight of how to rectify our situation and take the necessary steps to adjust.

At the end of it all the dog found a new loving home the very next day and I am beyond grateful that this all lined up however this was a big wake up call for myself to witness where I personally am and what I need to look at within my own life.

I hope this share supports you in any situation you may be going through that didn’t turn out as you hoped it would. I hope you get to see the opportunity as a position of growth and not to berate yourself but to make the decisions you need in those moments to rectify your situation, take accountability where it is needed and move accordingly.

Let us place our best foot forward and uplift ourselves by forgiving the situations & most importantly forgiving those in the situation that we may feel upset towards in playing a part of the experience.