Hxdream

If you are struggling with life—specifically your life, yourself—I hope this blog can serve as an option for you.

One of the questions I have been asking myself periodically is:

“What story am I telling?”

For many of us, this single question might not seem important or relevant to how it could support someone in their daily struggles. However, I would like to offer insights into why this is a powerful question to ask and observe.

As you wake up, what are the thoughts that flood your mind?

Maybe they are thoughts about work, people from work, responsibilities like feeding your dog, getting the kids ready, and mixed in with thoughts about finances—remembering how much you don’t have, what bills are coming up, and perhaps even thinking, “How can I make more money?”

The thoughts are endless for many of us, and this is how we start our day, with a rush of worries.

It would be unreasonable for me to tell you to deny these thoughts, to be ashamed of having them, or to think there is something wrong with you for waking up this way. This is part of the human experience, and due to the structure of the modern world, we have become conditioned to waking up like this.

I simply want to offer you an option, a way out.

All the thoughts that come to you when you wake up are often memories of yesterday, meant to support you in your today. However, if you are unhappy with life—specifically your life—these thoughts no longer serve you. Instead, they hurt you by overlaying your future with the past, a past you do not wish to keep recreating.

One step I encourage you to take is to notice your mind when you wake up each day.

What thoughts surface?

Simply take note—become the observer of your thoughts. Don’t try to change or stop them, just witness them.

From this space, ask yourself: Which of these thoughts do not serve me? Which ones hurt me, overwhelm me, or make me feel unhappy about life?

Take note of these thoughts. Get to know them—how they feel, where you feel them, how they affect your mood, and how they influence the way you start your day.

The goal is to simply observe and become aware of the character that continues to dominate your story.

This practice can be uncomfortable, frustrating, and at times even painful—so much so that we may feel unable to face our reality.

I understand. I’ve been there, and I know the pain that comes with this practice. But I encourage you to keep going—take note of what you’re experiencing and write it down in a journal. Get to know yourself, because only when we become aware of ourselves can we begin to shift and transform.

Change begins with awareness. You cannot change what you are not aware of.

Throughout the day, notice where you place blame in your life. Where do you find yourself complaining?

When you feel upset, pay attention to the narrative that arises in those moments. What story plays out when you’re hurt?

Often, these are the moments when we dip into our past. When we experience heartbreak, for example, we may revisit feelings of unworthiness, not being good enough, or memories of abandonment, abuse, and similar painful experiences from our past.

All of this heavy note-taking is a step toward self-awareness, but I also want to emphasize the importance of the next step, which, in my opinion, is where the real work and growth begin.

Often, we get so caught up in the chatter of our minds that we miss reality—we miss the present moment. For example, imagine you’re driving down a beautiful scenic route, but instead of taking in the view, you’re replaying a moment from your past or thinking about how you’ll approach your next work meeting.

This happens throughout our day. Instead of experiencing what’s right in front of us, we find ourselves living in our heads, trapped in a reality that only plays out in our minds.

Once we’ve taken note of our minds and the ratio between presence and thoughts, our true self-awareness work can begin.

We want to develop the ability to notice when our minds start racing with thoughts and immediately bring ourselves back to the present. Yes, the past happened, and yes, the mind often wants to dwell on it, but the truth is, the past no longer exists. Your body is in the present, in a reality that is not your past.

We want to align the mind and body so we can feel connected rather than disconnected.

The work lies in practicing presence—bringing yourself back to the present moment whenever you notice your thoughts running away from you.

Practice this throughout your day as you continue to take note of the thoughts that arise. What patterns do you see? What do you find yourself constantly thinking about?

While there’s much more to explore, I believe this is the perfect place to end this blog and the ideal place for you to begin your journey.

I also encourage you to establish a daily practice that includes both meditation and breathwork. If you’re looking for guidance in these areas, I can confidently recommend Owaken Breathwork and Dr. Joe Dispenza as great places to start.

Our suffering often stems from our thoughts. However, once we become aware of these thoughts, we can change the narrative. This shift in narrative will ultimately transform the story we live by, and in that story, we can let go of the character we no longer need to be or play.

Speak soon, let me know how this blog lands and if you have more questions you can find me on instagram @hxdream to inquire more, learn more. I am also happy to support you in a 1:1 onion peeling session where we peel back the layers of false identity. Either way I hope this blog itself gave you a little insight and a little shift on where to begin.